Corbinator 4.0

Introducing the all new Corbinator 4.0. This newer version of the Corbinator makes the old one look like a blessing. With its state of the art resistance to leg and a nack for running at fences, it'll teach you the meaning of sit-and-whoa. Stay in and you'll be the envy of the eq ring. At just the price of taking care of it (and your sanity), the Corbinator 4.0 is the perfect gift for that one barn brat that thinks they're special just because they rode a green horse once. If you like taking out strides, riding on the seat of your pants, and being thrown out of the tack on lead changes, call now and ship your new Corbinator today!

The Ambitious Equestrian, T. A. Eyo ¥, and her associates are not responsible for any harm that comes to you, your property, or others in your property at the hooves of the Corbinator 4.0.

*Pants not included

I'll stick with the old version of the Corbinator. At least that one made me look good. In most cases, I get easily bothered by horses getting hyped, but Corbin's usually laid back attitude plus the fact that he was completely lacking any kind of forward motion in warm-up meant that it took two fences before I got nervous. That's a record.

I forgot to mention that the Corbinator 4.0 also likes slicing fences that don't need to be sliced. I am not a jumper. We are not doing a jumper course. We are doing a small crossbar. Please tell me why that needs to be sliced. Miss J had me pull him out of a couple of fences because he was just going way too fast. After our two warm-up fences and a short course, it still took four more times over the crossbar before he was settled. I like laid back, you-won't-get-me-going-anywhere-without-spurs Corbin.