(another) Possible change of plans
I would have rather stayed home today than taken a lesson.
Romeo was so on point today, even with it being such a late lesson. I on the other hand was not. I could barely sit the trot today. My leg was pushed forward and my body was braced. When I was sitting, it wasn't a real sit because I was leaning forward and more perched than anything. The canter was also terrible. I couldn't contain Romeo's stride, nor could I push him into his corners or get him to use his butt at all. It was the same old, same old: too stiff in the back and shoulders, too loud with my upper body, hands not doing what hands are supposed to do.
It was mainly a flat lesson because the ground was soaked, but Miss J did give us the chance to do the brick fence because the area around it was dry. She said to pretend that George Morris was watching and was offering us a job but that we would be hired or rejected depending on how well we did the fence. I messed it up. Twice. The first time was not enough leg, and we slid to the base before bunny hopping to the other side. The second time had an okay distance, but I threw my body forward over the fence and let my leg slip. I got a "hire" on the second try, and I understand that trainers all want to be positive and keep us optimistic and confident about our riding, but that does nothing for me.
To top it off, I got the show packet that J² put together for everyone wanting to show with them this upcoming season. It had the schedule, a rider commitment, and, most importantly, all the fees that I need to know about. Unless my charm business magically kicks off and rakes me in some big bucks, there is no way that I can show Corbin this year as much as I had planned to. I would maybe be able to do two shows, and that's two individual shows, which means I either pick one weekend or I split it up. The rider commitment also says that we have to take one lesson a week, which I talked to Miss J about when I first mentioned showing with her, and she was okay with the every other week, but if I have to ride every week with her, then there is no way that I could still take lessons on Baby and get her ready for 3'0". Ironically, that was the whole point of this. I wanted to gain my confidence on Corbin so that I could help Baby out a little bit more. Showing with just Miss J alone is too expensive, but I'm not psyched to do another year of the same thing with Miss S because I know that I'm just going to be over faced and embarrass myself.
I'm just frustrated with constantly having to worry about the money thing, and two bad rides in a row are just a major confidence stab. I will say that watching nail art videos has really calmed me down since I got home. I suddenly have the desire to do some of these things.
Romeo was so on point today, even with it being such a late lesson. I on the other hand was not. I could barely sit the trot today. My leg was pushed forward and my body was braced. When I was sitting, it wasn't a real sit because I was leaning forward and more perched than anything. The canter was also terrible. I couldn't contain Romeo's stride, nor could I push him into his corners or get him to use his butt at all. It was the same old, same old: too stiff in the back and shoulders, too loud with my upper body, hands not doing what hands are supposed to do.
It was mainly a flat lesson because the ground was soaked, but Miss J did give us the chance to do the brick fence because the area around it was dry. She said to pretend that George Morris was watching and was offering us a job but that we would be hired or rejected depending on how well we did the fence. I messed it up. Twice. The first time was not enough leg, and we slid to the base before bunny hopping to the other side. The second time had an okay distance, but I threw my body forward over the fence and let my leg slip. I got a "hire" on the second try, and I understand that trainers all want to be positive and keep us optimistic and confident about our riding, but that does nothing for me.
To top it off, I got the show packet that J² put together for everyone wanting to show with them this upcoming season. It had the schedule, a rider commitment, and, most importantly, all the fees that I need to know about. Unless my charm business magically kicks off and rakes me in some big bucks, there is no way that I can show Corbin this year as much as I had planned to. I would maybe be able to do two shows, and that's two individual shows, which means I either pick one weekend or I split it up. The rider commitment also says that we have to take one lesson a week, which I talked to Miss J about when I first mentioned showing with her, and she was okay with the every other week, but if I have to ride every week with her, then there is no way that I could still take lessons on Baby and get her ready for 3'0". Ironically, that was the whole point of this. I wanted to gain my confidence on Corbin so that I could help Baby out a little bit more. Showing with just Miss J alone is too expensive, but I'm not psyched to do another year of the same thing with Miss S because I know that I'm just going to be over faced and embarrass myself.
I'm just frustrated with constantly having to worry about the money thing, and two bad rides in a row are just a major confidence stab. I will say that watching nail art videos has really calmed me down since I got home. I suddenly have the desire to do some of these things.
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| Take that, Picasso |
i'm sorry about the bad ride - and know exactly what you mean about it creating a dark cloud over all our big hopes and plans... bummer also that your plans for the year are being thrown in doubt financially - good luck figuring out what your biggest priorities are!
ReplyDeleteThank you. I've done some thinking on it, and I've got a new plan worked out for the most part.
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